I know I don’t have a right to complain, after all it’s not like I’m the only person in this situation. Many of you out there have had to endure much longer than I without it.
I am a man with needs. I have to have it on a daily basis or I’ll go crazy. I want it, and I need it soon.
My wife, bless her heart, is an understanding woman. She sees that look in my eyes and knows that my yearning is unquenchable.
I know I don’t have a right to complain, but damn it, it’s been 12 very long weeks!!!
I’ve tried to keep my mind off of it. God knows the chores I’ve done around this house to stay busy. I’ve painted almost every room in the house. I’ve replanted much of the garden. I am constantly doing the laundry including the wife’s lingerie and panties.
I’ve tried to blog more. It seemed more difficult when there was so much being said about all the women who were at the Blog”HER” convention.
But there is only so much a man can take! If something doesn’t happen soon, I’m going to be doing more than just howling at the moon.
But, I need a job. NOW!!!!
I need to be gainfully employed. I need a place to go to everyday and drink coffee, and lots of it. Someplace to talk about last night’s ballgame. I need a workplace to gossip about other employees and pick on the boss when he’s not looking. So for the sake of my sanity,
As I mentioned in my last post, I found it intriguing that many of our “fellow” bloggers have made the pilgrimage to the windy city of Chicago to meet this weekend.
From what I can extract from the conference website BlogHer seems to be an excuse to meet, greet and drink copious amounts of alcoholic libations.
I’m all for a party. Hell, I’ve instigated my fair share of them myself. But what I’m having a hard time understanding is why this is a gender based get together. I’ve looked over the website and have found almost 99% of the participants are female, hence the title of the conference. I was a bit surprised that I found a few men who were participating.
By the way dudes, really, a woman’s conference? Were you required to check your “cojones” at the door before they’d let you in?
When I started, I had the intention of writing a blog from the view of a dad, a husband, an ex husband, and generally the mind of a “middle aged” crazy man. I think got that last part right.
I had sought, in the beginning, advice from various other “male” bloggers. Many said that my primary audience would be women, and that I should take that into account when writing.
I didn’t….
But women have been reading, just as I have been reading their blogs. I have found that we are all a community of parents, soon to be parents, or frustrated and wanting to move away from our kids parents. That we all have our ups and downs with kids, spouses, in-laws, neighbors, schools, work and well, just life in general.
If a convention is in order, maybe we should consider one for all genders. No matter if you’re male, female, married, single, straight, gay, sane or insane, though the latter is usually a prerequisite to writing a blog.
A kind of, and I’m giving credit toSwirlGirlfor this, a BlogUs convention.
So Chicago has been done, where do you think we should hold ours….Fresno?
Yeah, that’s a picture of my dog . And no, Casey isn’t dead. She just acts like it. You’d think lying that way would put a kink in her neck. Maybe a doggie chiropractor will be needed…
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I’m finding that Facebook is both wonderful and frightening at the same time. It’s been great reconnecting with friends from my old high school and college years. It’s also been scary that people whom I thought I left in the past can find me as well.
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It seems that the more time I have off the fewer things get done. Sure the house looks good with a fresh coat of paint and for the most part it is usually clean and picked up. But you’d think with all this time off (still not working yet) that I’d be able to generate a new blog post more often than just a couple of times a week. I’m reading and commenting on most of your blogs out there, just not writing like I should.
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And yet, with all this time off the days just seem to fly by.
Day 68 of unemployment and counting…
On the plus side, my guitar playing is getting better. My middle child has now started to pick up the guitar as well. Think we might start a band.
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Some councilman for the city of Los Angeles is now looking into criminal charges as they relate to the Michael Jackson memorial. He feels that the owners of the Staple center in a response to losing money on Michael Jackson concert tickets coerced the city to supply their resources for the memorial. They in turn made money on the memorial, selling tickets.
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The Anaheim Angels are in first place as of today. They took a doubleheader from the Kansas City Royals yesterday. I’m still holding my breath. Being that it’s only the middle of the season, a lot can happen between now and the end of summer. At least they don’t play in the American League East Division. Who needs the hassle of the Yankees, Red Sox or Rays.
BTW Don’t ask me about Manny. I could care less.
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So here’s a shock. The star of one of my favorite TV shows got busted on a DUI charge the other day. JeffreyDonovan, star of the USA Network series “Burn Notice”, was arrested by Miami Beach police on suspicion of drunk driving. Shocking!!!!
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I might be dating myself, but the wife and I have tickets to see “Huey Lewis and the News” in concert next week. The last time I saw them was back in 1985 in Los Angeles. I was 25 years old and a year before I got married. They have got a bunch of hits and it should be a great concert.
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And last but not least. I keep reading in other people’s blogs about some convention called BlogHer. Sounds like a lot of women bloggers hanging out and talking about….blogging.
Is there a BlogHim convention that I don’t know about?
Since starting this blog, I get the occasional emails from businesses who want to advertise on it. They are usually marketing groups who hit most blogs at one time or another.
These businesses are usually looking for dads (and moms) who would be willing to try out the latest newfangled diaper with a built in monitor to check if the kid went number one or number two. Or it could be some exotic, organic, made in the backyard of some Amish family, all natural baby food. Or, it might even be some toy that will make your baby the next Einstein.
Since my blog is geared towards family and fatherhood, they just assume that I’m a new dad.
Nope, I’m an old one…
As the wife and I were walking the dog last night, I told her about this latest approach towards my blog. After laughing hilariously at the concept of me being a tester and why the hell my blog, she suggested that we come up with our own list. One more geared towards the father who has teenagers…..Daughters in particular.
So without further ado, my list of products that I would be excited to test:
Chastity Belts
Does this one need explaining? We’re looking for durability and an unbreakable lock.
Volvos
If I’m going to let me daughter drive, this is the car for her. This car company is known for building the equivalent of a tank. This particular model will need to be fully loaded with the latest reinforced armor. It will need safety bags throughout, and a parental video monitor to insure that no hanky panky happens in the back seat if they decide to go watch the submarine races.
Heavy Duty Baseball Bats
Every father needs a solid baseball bat to greet his daughter’s date at the door. It should be a reminder that a curfew is a curfew…damn it!
Shot Guns
In case the baseball bat didn’t get the young man’s attention. Just be cleaning it when he arrives at the door to pick up your daughter. He’ll have her home on time, even teenage boys aren’t that stupid.
Lie Detector Machines
Yeah, like they’re not doing anything behind that closed door…
Breathalyzer Tester
Let’s face it; you were a teenager once.
Unsexy Clothing
Have you seen how some of these girls dress for a date? I’m hoping the Amish look makes a comeback…
Cell Phone Texting
There needs to be a cell phone that shocks a teenager when their texting exceeds their time conversing with their parents…or anyone for that matter.
A Happy Pill
For the teenaged daughter. What I wouldn’t give to be a tester for this. As a father of three, there are times during the month that drama takes on a new meaning at the house. Come on Pfizer, Bristol Myers or whoever, can’t you guys see the need?
The last time I saw them was back in 1985 in Los Angeles. I was 25 years old and a year before I got married. They have got a bunch of hits and it should be a great concert.
