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Take It From A Man Who Knows…
Posted under Daughters, How I See It, Wife by Mike
While scanning my regulars I came across the latest from my friend M at This New Place. “M” is a single mom with two adorable daughters. The three of them have been living blissfully without the interference of a man in their lives.
Then about a year ago “M” walked into a small piano bar near her home and fell in love. There sitting behind the piano playing and singing his heart out was a man who swept her off her feet.
It has been fun to read M’s posts for the past year as she and “J” have dated, courted and now are cohabitating. Her recent posts have detailed the trials and tribulations that the three have had to contend with now that a man is in their midst.
After reading her recent posts, I had to smile. Stories of snoring, stealing the sheets on the bed, leaving the toilet seat up are all very familiar to my own situation.
Just as “J” has found himself in an all female household, I too have been living that nightmare. Being married and with three teenage daughters under foot, all J has to do is look at my situation to see what he has coming his way in a few years…
Without exception, toilet seats must be lowered. I know this is inconvenient but trust me, you don’t want the dirty looks you’ll get the first time one of them sits on cold porcelain in the middle of the night.
Your days of strolling around the house sans clothing have ended. Invest in a crappy robe, M will steal your nice robe anyways.
You thought your budget for toilet paper was high before? With women, it’s going to go through the roof.
As the girls get older you’re going to have a much tougher time sorting the laundry. Just whose frilly bra and thong underwear are these?
When young girls start to hit their teenage years you’ll find your house has more drama than a soap opera.
Start preaching this NOW. Boys are bad!!! Need I say more?
Right now your home has only one female whose hormones once a month require chocolate and bitching. In a few years that will triple. I’d look into a cave or bomb shelter to rent once a month. Might want to invest in Hersey’s stock, too.
But, above all else, no matter what anyone says, the number one rule is…..
The woman is always right.
You said that so well. A man of true experience!
Anne in SC´s last blog ..Quick Note from Vacation
Too funny! I’ll have to post your rules. In my house I am outnumbered by boys!
Bad Momma´s last blog ..Lessons Learned From BlogHer by Flat Bad Momma
It’s always good to be a fast learner in those things!
cocotte´s last blog ..A Bizarre Detour
This is some great advice. You could write a survival guide.
WeaselMomma´s last blog ..Getting Back Out There
I was fine until I got to the “frilly bras and thongs” part. NOT MY BABY GIRL!!!
Oh crap, I’m not ready for this.
Russ´s last blog ..Target, by Russ
WeaselMomma is right, they had those “Worst Case Scenario” books out a few years back. I think this would fit right in.
Russ´s last blog ..Target, by Russ
This made me smile. Good advice!
Luckily we have a pretty even household: 3 males & 2 females. I’m proud to say that the boys were taught from an early age that the toilet seat must be lowered after their business is done. The kids even was their hands afterwards! Who woulda thunk it?
NukeDad´s last blog ..A Part Used To Run Through It
Great post! I’m outnumbered in my house for sure! I need a framed picture of “Put the seat DOWN!” LOL!
We’ve never had that toilet seat argument in our house. Everyone has always lowered the seat and/or lid after using it. Problem solved.
I can’t argue with your cave/bomb shelter suggestion. Sometimes I’d like to have one myself… you know, just so I can put myself in time out.
terri´s last blog ..Tales from the Office
Ahem. First of all, even before I got on continuous birth control, I never got bitchy with my periods. Ever. That is not a universal experiene.
But let me tell you, it’s no picnic being a woman in a houseful of males, either. As a friend of mine described it, it’s like living in a cloud of testosterone.
secret agent woman´s last blog ..Breathe, breathe…
Shhhh- don’t tell my the testosterone our tricks.
swirl girl´s last blog ..Dear So and So….
I have the opposite dilemma. When our daughter left for college, it left me in a male dominated household. I haven’t fallen in the bowl because the toilet was left up, but I can now service any car after having to watch Speed Channel these past two years.
Tara R.´s last blog ..Later…
Excellent advice… You should run a boot camp for men who get thrown into the estrogen pit!
Kandee´s last blog ..Never a dull moment
Way too many women for me. I am still a bit worried about having another child. If it is a girl I will be completely terrified.
Otter´s last blog ..Random Tuesday Thoughts: Scotland
Anne in SC – Just a guy who’s been around the block or two…
Bad Mamma – Just do what I said in reverse…
cocotte – The faster the better, I always say…
WeaselMomma – I’ve already done that, it’s the blog…
Russ – Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you. But they do get older so look out…
Poetry’sTruth – Glad you got to smile today….
NukeDad – Sounds like a fair household. We’re all not that lucky…
Debbie Davis – Let’s see about getting you one…
terri – Could you talk with my wife?
secret agent woman – My appologies to the bitchy women out there. However, my experience has been….
swirl girl – It’s our little secret…
Tara R. – Cool, when can I bring my car over?
Kandee – Maybe I can start making a couple of bucks running that camp…
Otter – Don’t be scared, be prepared…
You forgot one: “There’s two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither one works.”
the last point says it all. The woman is always right (because it’s just easier that way)
M@´s last blog ..KendoCamp: So how cool is he?
I couldn’t agree more…you are one smart man!!!!!
Beth´s last blog ..you have GOT to be kidding me….NOT AGAIN!!!!!
To Quote Brad Paisley ” its not who wears the pants, it’s who wears the skirt!”
Hey – you seem to be doing ok.
Oscar´s last blog ..Sometimes the Answer is No.
Look at how behind I am at reading blogs! Love this post, it cracks me up. I have to say, I have never once asked him to put the seat down. If that is only one of the few things that we have to really adjust to, we’re doing pretty good. (except, he tends to move things around sometimes and nick walls, so he has some touching up to do…
this new place´s last blog ..Our friend Jack
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